The Little Girl Who Saw Things She Couldn't Explain

There is one part of my childhood that I have returned to more times than any other while writing this book. Not because it frightens me now but because I have often wondered what life must have looked like through the eyes of that little girl.

For as long as I can remember, strange images would come into my mind as I was going to sleep. They were not dreams because I was still awake. Night after night, I would see twisted faces, wolf-like creatures and men whose faces changed into something hideous. Sometimes they disappeared as quickly as they came. Other times they stayed long enough for me to lie awake wondering when sleep would finally come.

The strange thing is that I don't remember questioning them.

I didn't wonder why they were there or whether other children saw the same things.

They had always been part of my life, so I accepted them as part of my world.

Children have an extraordinary ability to adapt. They don't stop every five minutes to ask whether what they are experiencing is normal. They simply live inside the world they have been given.

Over time, I found my own way of dealing with the images. Every evening, once the light was turned off, I would deliberately create another picture in my mind. I imagined a little mushroom house with a garden path leading to the front door. There were fruit trees, flowers and green fields stretching into the distance. If I concentrated hard enough on that peaceful place, the frightening images gradually lost their grip on my attention.

Looking back now, I don't see a frightened child so much as a resourceful one.

She was doing the best she could with experiences she neither understood nor had the words to explain.

As I grew older, those experiences did not simply disappear. They changed. Other questions began to surface. My curiosity about the spiritual world grew, long before I had the maturity to distinguish truth from deception. At the time, I believed I was simply searching for answers.

It has taken me many years to look back on those early experiences with different eyes.

For me, this is not a story about fear. It's a story about truth.

Because truth does not become less true because it is difficult to talk about.

If anything, the things we find hardest to speak about are often the things that need bringing into the light the most.

It wasn't until much later that God began taking me on a journey of uncovering the truth. Not all at once, but one step at a time. Some truths were difficult to face. Others brought incredible freedom. Looking back now, I can see that He was never asking me to be fearless. He was asking me to trust Him enough to let His light reach every part of my story.

Standing on the Edge: A Fight for Freedom is the story of that journey. It is the story of how God led me to face the reality of those childhood experiences, where they ultimately came from, and the truth He wanted to reveal in their place.

If you've ever carried experiences you couldn't explain, or questions you've been afraid to ask, I hope my story reminds you that truth is never something to fear when it is held in the hands of God.

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