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The Psychology of Heaven

 Discerner of the thoughts and intents of the heart. 

Hebrews 4:12

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The development of a robust sense of self is crucial in human growth, allowing individuals to navigate life's complexities with confidence and resilience. However, this sense of self is not immune to erosion, as certain circumstances and experiences can diminish its strength and coherence. 


The construction of a sense of self is an intricate process that unfolds over the course of our lives, shaped by a myriad of experiences and interactions.

At its core, the sense of self represents our understanding of who we are, integrating our thoughts, emotions, memories, and behaviors into a cohesive identity. Yet, despite its apparent stability, the sense of self is vulnerable to various external and internal influences that can compromise its integrity. 



To shed light on the intricate dynamics of identity formation and preservation below are three specific instances where the sense of self can be diminished, highlighting the profound implications for individual well-being and identity formation.


1. Trauma and Dissociation: 

   Traumatic experiences can fracture the sense of self, leading to dissociative states where individuals feel detached from their thoughts, emotions, and memories. In the aftermath of trauma, the cohesive narrative of selfhood may unravel, leaving behind fragmented identities and a profound sense of disconnection. For example, survivors of childhood abuse may struggle to integrate their traumatic memories into their sense of self, leading to profound feelings of alienation and identity confusion. Dissociation serves as a protective mechanism, shielding individuals from overwhelming distress, but it also undermines the coherence of the self, hindering the process of identity integration and self-discovery.


2. Chronic Illness and Disability:

   The onset of chronic illness or disability can profoundly impact an individual's sense of self, challenging deeply held beliefs about identity and autonomy. Suddenly, the body becomes a source of limitation rather than empowerment, disrupting the continuity of selfhood and forcing individuals to renegotiate their relationship with their physical selves. For instance, a once active and independent individual may struggle to reconcile their new reality as a person with a disability, grappling with feelings of inadequacy and loss of identity. Chronic illness can overshadow other aspects of the self, overshadowing achievements, relationships, and aspirations, and leading to a diminished sense of agency and purpose.


3. Social Rejection and Stigmatization:

   Social rejection and stigmatization can erode the sense of self, undermining one's confidence, self-worth, and belongingness. When individuals are subjected to prejudice, discrimination, or ostracism, they internalize negative stereotypes and judgments, internalizing a distorted image of themselves as unworthy or inferior. Social rejection reinforces feelings of alienation and marginalization, exacerbating the erosion of self-esteem and identity coherence.



The development and preservation of a robust sense of self are essential for individual well-being and psychological resilience.

However, this sense of self is not impervious to diminishment, as evidenced by the profound impact of trauma, chronic illness, and social rejection on identity formation and coherence.


By understanding the mechanisms underlying the erosion of the sense of self, we can get a sence of what happend and why we think, feel and react the way we do. Making sense of our fragmented parts helps us begin the journey of reflecting for ourselves what God and others think and believe about us.





If you are interested in more of what I do. There are 4 ways I can help you on your self-discovery journey:


  • As a counsellor with 20 years experience including my own healing journey I give clarity and focus that brings my clients hope, peace, harmony, fulfilment and emotional intelligence for better decision making, resilience and influence. Read testimonials and book a session HERE.


  • I teach the life changing Journey to Wholeness Course. With teachings drawn from Optimised Life & the New Psychology  taking you week by week on a self-awareness healing journey from the inside out. Find out more HERE.


  • I offer Inner Healing Holy Spirit Discovery sessions to uncover deep insights about yourself, building genuine connections that will quickly remove inner confusion and chaos. Bringing back harmony, peace and hope. Find out more HERE.


  • I share my own recovery story from addiction, depression and emotional distress and confusion, so that others going through the same know they are not alone. My core goal is to go to war with shame, expose the enemy's plan and bring hope and light to the darkness. Read HERE.


Not sure where to start? Get in touch with your questions and you can have a FREE 20 min chat to work it all out. CONTACT ME via my website or email me kim@aliveingodswill.com.


I did a Holy Spirit Exploration session with Kim, as well as some EMDR sessions. The Holy Spirt session was so powerful. I have seen massive changes in my life. In this session, things that normally caused me distress for many years were handed over to God to transform. God has transformed them. Kim is an authority on God's word and her sessions are delivered in His mighty name.

Jennifer Cromer 


Read more testimonials HERE.




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